it's about tolerance and giving others space to exist, and knowing in advance that you don't understand their lives and what makes them do things u don't like<br><br>it's about knowing the difference between one who uses slurs flippantly vs one who bullies someone for eir identity

fleegar

@shoutplenty

i'm starting to realise there's a great dichotomy between people in my life who are judgemental and those who aren't. i suppose the worst such people i know are my mum and jpep

i think the worldview of a non-judgemental person is fundamentally totally different [1/13]

2/20/2023, 2:47:09 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

if you're not judgemental then it's hard to get why some ppl require u to behave a certain way else they will hurt or coerce you. this was rly stark to me yday when a peer threatened me w/ mental health detention. this presumption of knowing what's best for someone and forcing it

2/20/2023, 2:47:10 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

from my pov, everyone is entitled to live how they want. if i dislike some1's lifestyle or opinions, i'll stay away from em. i try to only personally criticise ppl when their actions harm me directly

basically, i separate how i feel about someone from how i act towards em

2/20/2023, 2:47:10 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

i remember in my first twitch bio for sms, i said "i aim to treat everybody the same". it seems like a very alien concept to the vast majority of ppl i know

judgemental ppl think their opinions of someone are hidden truths. i've seen so many justifications for bullying—

2/20/2023, 2:47:11 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

stemming from such opinions. they think "not having positive experiences with" someone implies that's a bad person who should be othered. they think if their opinion is popular then it's more valid. they think political opinions are moral truths + opposing opinions indicate evil

2/20/2023, 2:47:11 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

similarly, any unexplained negative action of someone they dislike indicates malice

tell me i've not described half the sms community here. or 90% of online social justice positions. a non-judgemental person can find common ground with both communists and conservatives

2/20/2023, 2:47:12 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

it's about tolerance and giving others space to exist, and knowing in advance that you don't understand their lives and what makes them do things u don't like

it's about knowing the difference between one who uses slurs flippantly vs one who bullies someone for eir identity

2/20/2023, 2:47:12 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

between one who tells your favourite person to fuck off vs one who keeps em trapped in a codependent relationship

with my mum, if i do smth she dislikes, she should lay down boundaries of what she won't tolerate. instead she turns it into a narrative about how i'm a bad person

2/20/2023, 2:47:13 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

jpitar have fairly trashed reputations by now for the several ppl they bullied out of the sms community by trying to ostracise them and even blow up their personal issues. there's an increasingly visible culture of hatefulness that follows their friends around

2/20/2023, 2:47:13 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

but w jpep, i struggled so much to understand what motivated him to be so judgemental that he'd secretly ostracise a close friend despite having never been hurt by him. there's a grandeur his opinions of me took on to where it was seemingly for the greater good if he could—

2/20/2023, 2:47:14 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

convert every1 to believe them. and that to me is a portrait of the most judgemental person i've ever met. he's maybe the only 1 extreme enough to where if he acted that way irl he'd get outcast but

in general, i think the world is very receptive to being judgemental

2/20/2023, 2:47:14 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

i have to keep reminding ppl that i do not owe anybody being alive for example. nor does anybody owe me anything like that at all. keep yourself to yourself. never initiate personal conflict. ppl deserve to be listened to and respected, and that's it

2/20/2023, 2:47:15 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

shoutouts to pumpman for being 1 of the most non-judgemental ppl i've spoken to lately. and i note the great irony w/ which mlarvitar publicly announced he wishes pumps doesn't get wr cos "a lot of things" are wrong w him

and wonder again why ppl cant tell the difference [13/13]

2/20/2023, 2:47:15 PM

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