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fleegar
@shoutplenty
flashbacks to the other day of my mum breaking into my room while i was speedrunning and me not bein able to pause to kick her out
she says she can’t sleep cos of controller noises past midnight but then doesn’t try to agree compromises or respect existing agreements [1/7]
1/24/2023, 9:21:47 PM
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linkfleegar
@shoutplenty
her strategy is to yell till i stop and mine will prolly be barricading the door. but the flashbacks make it rly hard to summon the energy to leave bed and enter the warzone that is doin speedruns. debilitating health and building site torture choke the daily hrs i have available
1/24/2023, 9:21:48 PM
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linkfleegar
@shoutplenty
she engages in the mlarvitar/lego6245-style gaslighting of ascribing malice where there is none. at best she could argue wilful disregard of her right to quiet but rather she spins my actions as being solely about her and viewed through me being out to hurt this helpless victim
1/24/2023, 9:21:49 PM
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linkfleegar
@shoutplenty
i remain amazed whenever i read what these victims say (most obvs that jeffcompass essay) how they stew in victimhood and don’t acknowledge their own harms. and not a single one will fucking talk it out
my mum when i call out this gaslighting – “i bet u do it to the others too”
1/24/2023, 9:21:50 PM
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linkfleegar
@shoutplenty
finally, i think abt how i ended up trapped here, keeping some1 awake (supposedly – it’s unclear if it’s a culpable action given she’s 2 walls away and often mounts false accusations of me making noise)
most ppl’d be patient, move out, fix things so they can live in peace
1/24/2023, 9:21:50 PM
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linkfleegar
@shoutplenty
however, i gave up on life a while ago so can’t and don’t wanna put time into long-term solutions. but then u realise this means, while you do live, u are a burden that causes pain. if you’re gonna go then ethically u have to actually go
1/24/2023, 9:21:52 PM
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linkfleegar
@shoutplenty
one day go be one day i go be free
1/24/2023, 9:21:52 PM
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