particularly since the bulk of the hatred coincided with the period in which i had spoken about lumardy and was looking for compassion<br><br>their passive, disguised, “we dont hate you its all in your head” approach really messed with my head

fleegar

@shoutplenty

my view on this situation and group of people was that it always seemed absurdly hard to deescalate these petty dramas. it seemed like they had a need to actualise resentments, to make them felt, like schoolkids, whereas i was expecting us to stay out of each other’s way https://twitter.com/Derpspace1/status/1609463805129392129

1/1/2023, 7:49:34 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

easy to forget the one-way bullying had gone on for a year before it was handled. and the excuses being given were things like these deleted numbers, me consulting on modding, bluntly criticising their institutions. excuses for public bullying, secret group hate and the like

1/1/2023, 7:49:35 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

what drew the most ire was my approach to making this constant resentment more visible by turning passive aggro into active confrontations and issuing discipline or writing exposés where i had the power to do so

in truth, their resentment had accumulated in and destabilised me

1/1/2023, 7:49:36 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

particularly since the bulk of the hatred coincided with the period in which i had spoken about lumardy and was looking for compassion

their passive, disguised, “we dont hate you its all in your head” approach really messed with my head

1/1/2023, 7:49:36 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

p much the one time i took things too far in handling this, i got served with a huge ban and made out to be an abuser. after a lot of hurt i’d caused from this unmet need for compassion, i found it easy to say “enough” and offer to talk

1/1/2023, 7:49:37 PM

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fleegar

@shoutplenty

but it seems impossible to deescalate w them unless im lucky to have social advantage, which in the long run i never will cos i’m seen as subhuman

any pain i cause is a permanent reason to cut me off for both the victim and eir friends, but if done to me it’s entirely forgivable

1/1/2023, 7:49:38 PM

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